12 (Stoic) Rules For Life - Bilingual Subtitles
Life without design, Seneca says, is erratic.
Basically, if we don't have rules,
if we don't have practices that we're trying to abide by,
standards we're holding ourselves to, we're just kind of winging it, and this is where we get ourselves into trouble.
Meanwhile, when we have clear black and white rules,
when we have standards, well, then, It makes our decisions, it makes our lives, it makes our days much easier.
So what I want to talk about in today's episode.
I to give you 12 Stoic rules for life.
A Stoic rule for life is that you have to own the morning.
One of the most.
Relatable passages in Mark's releases meditations is him struggling with precisely this rule.
He's woken up.
It's before dawn It's cold and he doesn't want to get up and he says,
you know But is this what you were put here to do to huddle under the blankets and stay warm?
No, of course not.
We responsibilities.
We have obligations.
We have potential.
We want to go realize that so a stoic It up early, they rise to meet the morning because we're lucky to have the morning.
One of the flip sides of the stoic momento morning practice is if you went to bed thinking,
hey, this is the end of my life.
It's over.
When you wake up in the morning, you're like, this is extra, how awesome is this?
And you're excited to get up and get after it.
We can win the morning by,
getting up early,
by not getting sucked into our phone,
by not getting sucked into what other people want from us,
but by being intentional,
by being proactive,
spending some time with a journal,
going for a walk,
doing deep work, focusing on the most important task, right, concentrate on what's before you like a Roman, Mark's realist tells him elsewhere meditation.
So, if we win the morning, we've already won a good chunk of the day, and remember, if we win the day, then, well, that's awesome because our life is made up of days.
Another stoic rule for life is to focus on what's in our control.
Epitetia says this is like the most basic job of the philosopher.
There's some stuff that's up to us.
There's some stuff that's not up to us.
And if you don't know the difference, you're lost.
And we have to understand we have a finite amount of energy.
And so if we focus on things that are not up to us,
what other people say,
what other people do,
what's already happened,
what may happen in the distant future, what we're neglecting is what's right here in front of us, what is up to us.
Not a lot is up to us, but our opinion.
Our opinions up to us, our emotions are up to us, our actions are up to us.
What we do about what has happened is up to us.
And so this idea of mastering the dichotomy of control,
mastering what was laid down in the serenity prayer,
having the courage to change the things that we can, the to accept the things that we cannot change.
is a critical stoic rule.
I on what's up to me.
I leave what's not up to me to other people.
I leave the mistakes to other people.
I leave judgments to other people.
I leave the worry and anxiety to other people.
I'm going to focus on what's up to me.
I'm going to do what I can do here.
Another stoic rule for life is to be present to not suffer from imagined trouble.
So about anxiety, think about worry, think about fears.
What we're doing is thinking about things that are not in our control, thinking about things that haven't happened yet.
Seneca says, he who suffers before it is necessary suffers more than it's necessary.
He says, we suffer.
more in our imaginations than in reality.
It's a bad use of our creativity to run our minds over this terrible thing that's going to happen and now when that happens then we're going to have to do
this and then this is going to happen and then this and all of a sudden we've catastrophized
ourselves into an alternate reality that's never happened before.
They probably will not happen and you know what we have done?
We've neglected the thing that is in our control.
So look, of course, the Stoics are realistic.
They think about the things that could happen,
but in so far as to come up with a plan for how they would respond to that,
and then they move on, they come back to being present.
What's in my control right now?
What can I do, right?
They're proactive, but they're not irrational.
and they don't torture themselves.
Another important stoke rule is to just do one thing every day.
Seneca writing to his friend Lucili says, look, let's try to acquire one thing every day.
This is something that will fortify us against poverty, against death, or any other kinds of misfortune.
Like a quote, a story, an an anecdote, And this is what he and his friend, Lucilius, are doing in their letters back and forth.
He goes, here's the thing I promised you.
And he's excited to get the thing from Lucilius.
So again, the path to wisdom isn't like these amazing epiphanies, this huge breakthrough.
It's also not something you do one time.
It's a day-to-day thing.
So if you see philosophy as a thing that you do,
that you're acquiring one new thing, one new understanding, and one passage, one one page, one essay.
If you think of it as this ongoing process, that's what Stoicism is as a philosophy.
So about my rules.
I try to find one stoic insight every day.
That's kind of what Daily Stoke was built around.
Then you're going to be making a lot of progress.
Now related to this rule is another really important stoke rule.
It's also expressed in the motto of the Boy Scouts to do one good turn every day.
We have to understand that stoicism is not this selfish self-absorbed philosophy.
It a philosophy of virtue, is a philosophy of doing the right thing.
And so how can you think about going through your life.
How can you set a rule or an intention for yourself that you try to do one helpful thing every day?
You do one kind thing every day.
You do a generous thing every day.
You do something decent.
And these can be big things or small things.
But let's understand that virtue that just as specifically as one of the virtues is a verb.
and not a noun.
It's a thing you are doing.
So Stowe tries to do the right thing, not generally, but tries to do the right thing specifically in this situation, in that situation.
How am I going to treat this person?
What's the choice that I'm going to make?
How am I going to respond to this?
Not what can I get away with, not what's the minimum, but what's the minimum.
good I can do here.
A tries to go through the day doing good things.
Seneca said we have to remember that every person we meet is an opportunity for kindness.
Think about it this way,
that people you meet are an opportunity to do the right thing, to do a good thing, to do a kind thing.
Another stoic rule is actually I think best for phrased as a question.
Marx really said we have to ask ourselves in everything we do and say and think is this essential?
And he says, because the problem is most of what we do and say and think is not essential.
But when we eliminate the inessential, we get the double benefit of doing essential things better.
Maybe this rule is best expressed.
Do only the essential things.
Get rid of the extraneous, right?
Simplify.
ask yourself, am I doing this because other people are doing it?
Am I doing it because I've always done it?
Or am I doing it because it's important?
Am I doing it because it matters?
Am I doing it because it moves me forward?
Am I doing it because it's a good thing to do for myself or for other people?
And if it's not eliminate, no is such a powerful word.
No, I'm not gonna do that.
No, I'm not interested, no thank you.
We have to say no because when we say yes to things because we don't want to be rude to someone,
we are in fact being rude to ourselves, to our family, to our other obligations.
When we say no, we are also saying yes to the things that are essential and important.
Mark Stuis says, if you want more times, you want more tranquility, you're going to have to eliminate the inessential things and only do.
essential things.
And we can imagine if you're the emperor of Rome how important this was.
There was an unlimited amount of requests and impositions on his time.
He was not disciplined.
If he did not say no, he would never get the important things done.
A critical stoic rule is to speak with the death.
Now, what does that mean?
I know that's a confusing.
When Zeno was a young man, he went and he visited the oracle at Delphi.
And the oracle said, you will become wise when you begin to have conversations with the dead.
Now, we had no idea what this meant until he ended up in a bookstore many years later, having washed up and lost everything.
And in this book story, here's the man reading a passage from Socrates.
And this is when Zeno,
who was living not long ago,
after Socrates had died, that Zeno finally understood the prophecy, that reading was a way to have conversations with the dead.
That's what philosophy was.
This is why they called the Western canon a great conversation.
So what I'm saying is you should be reading every day.
Not reading the news, not reading social media, not reading the comments on this YouTube video, but reading every day.
Are you lingering on the works of the master thinkers, as Seneca said?
Are you pouring over the great texts?
This is where we can find that one thing a day, right?
But you should be reading every day,
taking a little quiet time, having a little stillness, you're away from your screens, you're away from the noise of the world, and you're reading.
You put yourself in the same room as Socrates, or Zeno, or Seneca, or Lincoln, or Shakespeare, you can talk to these.
people.
You can be inspired by Cato or his daughter Portia Cato.
This is a wonderful thing.
As said, books allow us to annex into our age all the ages of the past.
It's a way to draw on the wisdom from the people who came before us and this has to be a stoic rule of life.
The stoic rule is that we are tough on ourselves but tolerant for others.
Now might think with one of the stoic virtues being discipline,
the stoics are tough on other people, but it's important to remember that they're talking about self-discipline.
This is why Mark Smith says, remember, tolerant with others strict with yourself.
He's saying, look, I can hold myself to high standards because that's in my control.
Can he hold his troublesome steps?
brother Lucius Ferris, his co-emperor, to the same standards, no, he cannot.
Because, again, remember, it's called self-discipline.
Remembering that other people make mistakes, other people are not as educated as you, other people don't have the advantages that you have.
Other people don't understand stoicism the way you do.
So, to be tough on them, to be judgmental to them, to write them off is to make a mistake.
Mark Schruhe says, you gotta remember we're all meant to work together.
He said, we can't blame them.
We can't let them implicate us in their low standards or their problems.
We can't let them drag us down.
But we also can't write them off or exclude them.
You still have to have boundaries.
Again, you still have to maintain your standards, but you wanna be do tolerant and forgiving other people.
And look, remember, we are pretty tolerant with ourselves too.
When we mess up, when we make a mistake, we understand our reasons.
We understand that it doesn't say that much about us as a person.
Now, let's make sure we're extending that same courtesy to other people.
Come up with an explanation that allows you to have hope and faith in them.
Come up with an explanation that explanation that allows you to understand and empathize with them.
Come up with an explanation that allows you to be compassionate and understanding of them.
Another stoic rule is that we make beautiful choices.
Epictetus says if you want to be beautiful, make beautiful choices.
He would have been familiar with an idea from Musonius Rufus's teacher.
teacher says, look, if you do something in pursuit of pleasure, the pleasure passes quickly, but the shame remains.
He says,
but when you do something hard in pursuit of virtue,
when you do something difficult, or when you exert self-discipline, he says, the work expires quickly, but the pride remains.
And so as we think about the choices that we have to make in the course of the day, are we making?
the hard right choices.
Are we making the beautiful choice?
The famous choice that the founding of stoicism is known as the choice of Hercules.
Hercules comes to a crossroads and he has to choose between virtue and vice the easy way and the hard way.
Hercules not have become Hercules if he'd chosen the easier path.
So as you are deciding between getting up and hitting the snooze button and rolling over, right?
Which are you going to make?
Are you choosing between the kind thing or the unkind thing?
Are you choosing beautifully or not?
Are you choosing between going for the run or sitting on the couch?
Beautiful or not beautiful?
Are you choosing on being forgiving and understanding?
Or are you choosing between being strict and harsh and unfair?
We make beautiful choices and we are
beautiful a great stoic rule is to listen more than you speak Zino said look we
have two ears and one mouth for a reason and we have all sorts of great quotes
from the Stoics about saying you know look it's better to trip with your feet
than your tongue or as you're about to talk to ask yourself hey is this better
left unsaid The discipline and the wisdom to shut up is a very powerful one.
There's a story about an ancient Spartan who's sitting there at this dinner.
Everyone's talking.
Everyone's talking.
He's sitting there and finally someone says, hey, why haven't you spoken?
Are stupid?
And he says, if I was stupid, I wouldn't have been able to be quiet this whole time.
And so if we understand that we're here to learn that we're always studying and
reading and trying to absorb knowledge as opposed to vomiting it out, we're going to get better.
One of the laws in the 40 laws of power is always say less than necessary.
We regret what we say much more often than we regret what we didn't say.
And focusing on putting your ego aside, not needing to prove how smart you are, not needed.
to fill the awkward silence, but be willing to listen, be willing to hear, to absorb.
That's how we find the one thing a day.
If we are always talking and producing in Yamaran, we're gonna miss all the lessons that are out there.
So still tries to cultivate humility, tries to cultivate in openness and awareness, and this is an essential part.
part of the stoic practice.
The most important stoic rule is to remember that everything is an opportunity, to turn every obstacle into an opportunity.
In release, his passage, he the impediment to action advances action, what stands in the way becomes the way.
He says that, doesn't matter what happens to us, we always have the ability.
to accommodate, adapt.
It's not always that every situation is going to be a to make more money or to be more successful,
but we always have a chance to practice virtue, right?
We always have a chance to make beautiful choices, even ugly situations.
In fact, you could argue that the upside of ugly situations is the opportunity to make a beautiful choice.
someone hurt you, you didn't choose it.
It's not what you wanted.
It's a chance for you to choose forgiveness, let's say.
You've been discriminated against.
You've been held back.
You make the choice to persevere,
to push through, and also the beautiful choice, the virtuous choice, not to become ridden with grievances resentment or anger.
So, So stoic say that we don't control what happens, right?
We how we respond to what happens.
We control what we make of the situations that life finds us in.
We turn it into account, we use it all as fuel.
He says,
just like what you throw on top of a fire becomes fuel for the fire, so too with the obstacles and difficulties of life.
So the stoic is in.
just kind of resigned and passive.
A is active.
Everything throw at them makes them become greater, right?
Because they're making beautiful choices, because they're doing good things for the world, because they're being present, right?
They're able to convert and adapt all the circumstances of life to their own advantage and benefit.
The final and most important stoic rule and stoic practice is this idea of memento mori.
The say, look, you don't die once at the end of your life.
In fact, you're dying every day.
You're dying every minute.
As time passes, it is dead to you and gone forever.
The reason we have to be present, why we can't worry about what's already happened.
or worried about what will happen is that what's in front of us is the only thing that we have for sure.
You could leave life right now.
Mark's really said let that determine what you do and say and think.
Right?
That's why this is a stoic rule.
Focus on this thing in front of you as if it matters, as if it's the last thing that you can do.
Don't tell yourself it doesn't matter.
Don't tell yourself that you get a second chance that you can do it again later.
Don't tell second yourself, you'll do it tomorrow.
Because you don't know that that's happening.
And as we wind down our lives,
right, as we wind down our day, we say to ourselves, hey, that was it, I lived a full life today.
And so when we wake up in the morning,
if we are so lucky, we're excited, we rise to meet the dawn, we want to get after it.
Because this is a second chance, this is bonus time, we're playing with how.
money now.
Let's use it.
Let's make the most of it.
Let's make beautiful choices.
Let's be, as Marx really said, the person that philosophy tried to make us.
And that's what these rules are for.
They're to help you become what you're capable of being, help you do what only you are capable of doing.
Every day, I send out one stoic inspired email to hundreds of thousands of people all over the world.
If you want more stoic wisdom in your inbox, you can sign up at dailystoic.com slash email.
It's totally free.
Don't forget to at any time we'd love to have you dailystoic.com slash email.
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