Impractical Jokers funniest moments part 12

Impractical Jokers funniest moments part 12 - 双语字幕

You know when you write an email,

you're like, shoot, I don't know if I hit sand or I should wait a second sleep on it.

I like an objective opinion.

Here's what it is.

Troy, question, are you Chinese?

I've wondered for some time now, and I didn't know how to broach a subject.

Whenever I'm around you,

I send out a vibe and I just want to know if you're not don't sweat it that you're still

awesome and I'm sorry I brought it up I don't want to insult him you know I'll

see you at Kristin's next week hope there's enough sour cream this time

LOL I'm good a friend are you here's the thing though I've known him for like a

decade to not question if you know someone for dick If you think you'd kind of know.

Yeah, but it's almost at this point, I should know if he's Chinese or not, right?

I've known for a decade, how the heck could you not know his backness?

This guy's just coming!

This guy's just coming and then jump to these drops!

Let's start with this, is he Asian or are you about that?

I know.

What am I supposed to know if Troy Chen is Chinese?

I'm supposed to know that Troy Chen Troy Chen is Chinese.

I know.

Oh, that's a giveaway.

Troy's the giveaway?

Troy.

That's a Is that Japanese?

He's got to be Chinese?

That's a Korean.

I mean, I got one more time.

I'll take my shoes off.

Oh, my God.

Where's Terry?

Back to the email.

You think it's ready to send?

Show us your Yeah, I don't think you heard it.

It's kind of funny.

This is Troy Chen coming in.

Troy!

What's up, Troy?

What's up, buddy?

What's up, What the home runs today?

How's it going?

Good to see you, man.

Quick question.

You Chinese?

Yeah.

Oh, all right.

Whoa!

It's time for your punishment, buddy.

So we're just going to clean you up.

Oh, I'm a really pretty clean guy.

Oh, this is going to be a good one.

Why don't you just follow us?

Yes.

Come on.

What was going on?

Go on down.

Where?

This would be the end of my time on the show.

Really?

I would quit.

All right.

Hop in, bud.

Do I take this off again?

Why do you get caught might as well here come for me.

This is terrifying Just gonna clean you up a little are you doing?

Carving something to my head just lean back lean back relax.

Yeah, let me help.

Let me help.

There you go Well judge We see you all!

So back relaxed.

Let me show you where I brush off, just relax your butt.

Oh, my are locked, are you kidding me?

You love his sheep and men's eyebrows all right?

Well, we're about to.

It's my nephew's confirmation in two weeks.

I'm going to give you a buzzer!

Ah!

Oh, my God!

Stay still.

Leave me.

Oh, my Oh, my Oh, you Oh, my Oh, my God.

What does this look like?

It's okay.

This is not right, guys.

Oh, my God.

Oh, this looks like right now.

Oh, my God, it looks like Luther.

Well, not yet.

Oh, my Say goodbye to the scrops when you got left up here.

It's all going.

Bro, you angry?

I tell.

You have eyebrows.

No, are mad?

You me, oh you said?

When we finish, and we take a picture together.

Sure.

Could you have eyebrows down?

When came I look in the mirror?

Oh, God!

It looks weird.

It looks like it just came out of a vagina.

Look at the back.

This is the best part.

We found a way to make it worse.

Thanks so much.

We got to get you to your appointment, bud.

Come on, man.

This enough.

What nice appointment.

because the thing is that this grows back, right?

So there's only one way to capture this moment in eternity.

New driver's license photo.

Yeah.

You got two o'clock in the day.

Oh, actually.

Look at my driver's license photo.

All right, Murr's ready for his appointment at the DMV.

I think every time you have to show photo ID, this is what's looking at the jacket.

I can't even stand next to him anymore.

It's creepy.

Come back.

No.

I gotta cancel everything.

I cancel everything.

You like this?

Yeah!

Look!

All right, bud.

Go in.

All right.

See you later.

Oh.

Ha-ha-ha Somebody's male cake.

Driving license is here.

We haven't seen it yet.

Oh, God.

All fellas.

Oh, my God!

Ha-ha-ha You look like a demon.

Hell, yeah, that is bad.

Smire's March 2026.

Oh, my So, dude, it's gonna be a long decade.

Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha Hi, what's your name?

Richard.

Richard, got it.

Thank you.

Marge, just cut your tie off.

Just, yeah, cut, grab the scissors in front of you.

Just got to shred these papers.

You never, never, never done a focus before.

Well, actually I did win, but it wasn't like a...

Do you know the way it works, though, right?

You go in and ask you about these questions that they have no idea.

They have no idea what the brand is.

You got me a towel.

Oh, sh**.

I got me a towel in the back.

Give me one second, okay?

I an outfit in the back.

Do me a favor, grab that bucket of water.

What was wrong?

I was saying to this.

Just stand right here for a second.

Okay, let me help you in.

What is going on?

What on?

No, no, wait, wait, wait, wait!

What are you talking about?

That's all I messed up.

What are we doing?

It's a refusal to the situation.

I didn't have enough to tie.

He just went outside?

No, I didn't go outside.

Mark, take your call.

Now, Mark, how'd get up and casually, while on the phone, stroll over to the elevators?

Yeah.

I probably only, like, maybe eat 30 or so.

What'd you say when you told him?

What's that?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's 100-foot cord.

Get in the elevator.

What's going on?

I have to figure it out.

Yo, what the fuck is that?

Yo, what the fuck is going on?

Come back up.

Alright, come back up.

I thought I was on my cell phone.

I thought I was on my cell with my girlfriend.

I slipped.

Okay, Mark, it's time to close up.

Shuddle the lights off one by one and just get the hell out of there.

Almost quitting time for me.

Okay, let me just make sure all these are all okay, okay, the fax machine is off

now Just leave you get me elevated Well, well, well is a big one here.

This is all we're telling you about this Is right now you're at a conference center.

Yeah, and when you go into the room and they need to volunteer you're the volunteer That's all you're getting.

We're not telling you anything else.

What kind of conference is it one way you raise your hand and say I'll do this just take your punishment like a man like a man.

Is that a clue?

No, we're just trying to tell you a man up I'm Dr.

Frank Hey, guys, what are doing today?

I'm a of internal medicine.

I'm the guy you go to for your yearly physical.

So who's afraid of a yearly physical?

A lot of people have Dr.

Fear.

Everybody's afraid to let a doctor touch them sometimes.

And what's the one part of the exam that most guys hate the most?

The prostate exam, right?

Oh, there is.

So you bring somebody up and do a prostate exam.

You put it together.

So I'm going to ask for a volunteer.

A free prostate exam, who can turn that down?

I know one person that can turn it down.

Anybody?

It's a punishment, you got it, but do it.

Yeah, fine.

Yeah, I'll it.

You're the winner.

Come on down.

You're next.

The is right.

I'm going to put some gloves on.

I'm going to put some jelly on my finger.

I'm going to have you bend over.

Oh, God.

Look at this guy.

Look this guy.

to watch.

I'm going to take a deep breath and...

This crazy.

The harder you fight, the it's going to be for both of us.

Merse important, don't f*** them right away.

LAUGHTER I'm gonna bend over at the waist.

I know what to do.

I it.

OK.

Look at the whole crowd turn right now.

Look, the crew cannot wait for this to happen.

It looks like you're hovering over like a NASA mission.

Everyone's just like tense, like, oh my god.

Well, we are going to the dark side of the moon.

LAUGHTER All right?

And deep breath.

Deep breath.

She's in!

Murray's getting healthier!

Very good.

It looks like you suck it on a lemon!

Now we check the right part.

The lobe.

Check to the left.

You a finger in your head!

Check in the middle.

You have a finger in your ass on television.

There you go.

Whoo!

Good news is, everything is fun.

That was a perfectly normal prospect.

I'm relieved, Murr.

I'm relieved that you're safe and sound.

Take care, guys.

You are impossible to take seriously in that outfit.

You look so stupid.

I'm actually hyperventilating.

What are you so afraid of?

You're just going to get there and cook.

I make cereal and sandwiches exclusively.

There you go.

There go.

You can't even the court.

How's everyone doing?

Good.

How are you?

We just start with every meal.

We start every meal.

Whether traditional.

Whether it's traditional.

Japanese song.

Japanese hibachi song?

You got it buddy.

Sing the song.

Ladies and gentlemen, ladies and gentlemen, I will now do something amazing.

You will now see something amazing.

Now do something amazing, sir.

I...

Ladies and gentlemen, here.

Butterfly.

LAUGHTER So, hey, uh...

Hey, your is volcano, is that right?

Let's make the panted volcano volcano.

Who wants to see, uh...

a volcano volcano?

Everybody?

Have you guys seen it?

You right?

LAUGHTER You prepare for something amazing.

She's backing up.

She's getting out Oh, my You're gonna lose yourself, get him to stay.

Please don't go.

You're gonna miss something very amazing.

They leave, you lose.

Please stay.

Murr, you may realize that there's a speed bag hanging from your rear view mirror.

I the speed bag.

That's how you can get your punches in.

Matt?

Yeah.

Hey, man.

James, how are you?

Good, how are you?

So you're from New Hampshire, right?

You're from New Hampshire?

No, I'm actually, I'm from Canada.

Punch the bag.

Hey, Murr, pull over and run into that store.

Would you mind if I'd run it for one second?

Oh, absolutely, yeah.

Thank you, bud.

Okay.

Over at the end.

Yeah.

We a lot of stuff in this storefront.

Just grab all of it and start putting it in the back seat with this guy.

Okay.

Do you mind?

I'm sorry, bud.

Yeah, no problem.

Do guys have it for them?

Do you mind?

I'm just trusting right over you.

Just trusting everything.

Thank you so much for going camping, to sleep bags, and the bowling balls just right there.

Where you guys going camping?

Brooklyn, Brooklyn, Brooklyn, we're heading there.

Yeah.

Brooklyn.

One of favorite animals are up there in Canada.

One of my favorite animals is up in Canada, actually.

The big antlers and...

The big antlers, what are they called?

Goose.

Yeah, Canadian Canadian No, moose, moose.

No, wait, moose.

Moose, moose.

moose.

You want some?

No, I'm good, I'm good.

Is it cause of my lips?

No, it's not that.

Mar, there's a friend on the street there, Adam Shootie.

Doesn't he owe you money?

Get punch him in the face.

Get back, get home.

Give me one sec, bud.

This guy owes me money.

Just an eye on me.

One sec.

Hey!

Oh, my God!

Fuck!

Oh, no.

Excuse me.

Hey, let me ask you a question.

If went camping.

If you went camping, right?

And you woke up.

When you woke up.

And you woke up.

Your camping buddy was in.

in the same sleeping bag.

Your camping buddy was in the same sleeping bag as you.

And it was kind of stroking your head and kissing your ear, and it was like stroking your hair and kissing you, right?

Would you tell anybody?

I don't know.

Yeah, I probably know it.

Hey, you want to go camping?

Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, go!

Yeah!

Hi!

Yeah!

MUR is that big loser.

We on Pier 60 at a tech conference thrown by Sysense.

We're Murr.

You got to give a speech.

A speech.

I could do that all night long.

This time we're going to mess with you voice.

Yeah.

You'll notice in the microphone there's a tube that's connected to either helium for your voice.

to go high, or sulfur hexafluoride to make your voice go low.

So you suck it, and then you talk, and then craziness ensue.

Got it, got it.

You're fine, because all you have to do is go out there and suck what you do every second, anyway.

So can you say this is a streaming service that allows you?

This place, I said, this is an invitation only.

Industry leading event right now.

These are the people that have forged the future.

That's exactly right.

Through technology.

You'll find that.

Our next guest is a professor of science, technology, and society at New York University.

His research in the field of neural augmentations and data technology.

Neural augmentation.

Please welcome to the stage Dr.

Dan.

Dexter Scott.

All right.

You're up.

All right.

So we're to tell you which one to suck into the helium and the sulfur.

My name is Dr.

Dexter Scott.

I'm going to share a story about my own addiction to technology almost ruined my life.

I'll never forget that breezy perfect day just at the start of the summer and I was married to my high school sweetheart, Dr.

Mary Jo Simmons.

Oh, I'm so excited.

It was also the year I got my first smartphone.

Suck!

Mary Jo was truly my better half.

However, on our wedding day, I get a very important call regarding the patent I was working on.

What you say about some sulfur?

Suck.

Here we go.

The fools at the US government denied my patent.

This patent would have created a symbolic symbiotic relationship between humans and technology.

Instead of this blue screen house that we live in, AHHHHH!

Let us go!

And Mary Jo finally burst through my door in her wedding dress and begged me to turn off the phone.

And then I did something I would always regret.

I turned and yelled at Mary Jo.

Suck!

Get out of here you ignorant child.

I'm out of phone in the laptop.

Can't you see this is bigger than us?

We broke up.

She married my rival, Professor Arthur Goodthod.

And I had to start over without my patents or precious Mary Jo.

Now I've learned that the best way to use technology.

That's all for...

is to become the technology.

Behold, I am the Megabyte, and I control all the technology as real.

You're a villain.

Resistance is futile.

This is the Supervillain Megabyte origin story.

Another you should always, always do...

It's fear me.

Fear me.

Have you ever considered...

This is so super!

Pay more attention to your phone than a fellow human is...

Self and time.

Completely pointless.

Now there will only be technology like myself shutting down Earth lights in three, two, three...

Oh, your firewalls are too strong.

My mainframe is getting hunted.

Go back again.

You haven't seen the worst of me, Jimmy.

The bigger one will interface with your children and your children's children.

Thank you.

for your time.

My mother is here to pick me up.

All right, here we go, Marty.

Hello.

Checking out?

Yep.

James Murray.

Okay, do you have any notes for the moderator?

Uh, gosh, maybe your bathroom break would have been nice.

Very good.

It be a very great work, Marty.

Hey, did my twin brother come out?

Yeah.

Whoa, Marie.

I don't think so.

Okay.

You're me right now.

She's gonna come out again as himself?

Yes, move.

That bitch.

That's impressive.

That is, he doesn't do a lot of impresses.

Count him in eight seasons.

Ready?

Come as your twin brother.

Right.

Ha ha ha!

This is Twink.

Check it out!

Yes!

My name is Craig Murray.

God!

I just met your brother.

How would you describe your experience here?

That's great.

I wish it was a bathroom break, but that's just...

The twin has the same problem.

A bladder is running the family.

Thank you so much, I appreciate it.

Take you.

Ahh!

Craig Murray pulls it off.

Oh, that's an eye check.

James, James too easy.

Famous last words.

You how cocky he was just now?

All right, here we go, Mark.

Oh, my God.

Hello.

How are you?

Oh, well, how are checking out please.

Oh my god.

The name is Roy George Goldstein.

Alright, and where are you originally from?

Where am I from?

I come and go.

I and go.

And how was your experience here today?

It lovely and fascinating.

I it was just a whole new world.

with a focus group.

Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, Take care of your day.

She's just going to let it go.

I feel like I'm going to find Murray's dress like this on a Friday night in the morning.

All right, Murray, I to wait with this one.

Whoa, what the hell?

Hello.

What is he?

I'm Jean Levy.

Eugene?

What a weird choice.

Eugene love me from Splash.

Do you have any notes for your mother?

Uh, she was no Daryl Hannah.

What is a matter with you?

You have a great day.

No no smirk.

I think you've got someone who's got like memento disease.

Here we go.

Ready, Mark?

Oh my god.

Hello, Lassie.

Hello.

There's Seamus Somari.

She's so merry.

merry.

She's merry.

She's is the first two guys.

Where are you from?

Mcdublin, No Ireland.

I'm from New Irish.

And Scottish.

A little bit of both.

Dublin, Ireland, and you're Scottish.

You look earlier.

Aah!

She got him!

Perhaps that wasn't my best performance.

Why did you tell me to wear a tie and a shirt for this?

This is a fancy three-course meal.

Yeah, it's fancy, buddy.

You have to finish all the courses while race car Bob is flying around the track.

We know it's my car, which is nice and easy.

This the only major purchase I've made in my life.

You look scared.

You scared.

It's my car.

I'm scared.

Excuse me, Mr.

Quinn?

Yeah.

Your first course is being used.

Here's your appetizer.

Delicious I can't even physically eat this one soup.

Gentlemen, start your engines!

Where's your bum?

Be nice.

On your marks!

Get set!

Blocko!

Oh, this is pretty!

This so far, bud!

It's not fun.

Where's my phone?

My seven.

Johnny, Johnny.

Burn.

Stop!

Oh my god I'm going to throw up already.

We got started.

Oh.

The second course will be right out.

Yeah.

Come on.

Oh, my God.

There's food everywhere.

Okay, but I'll take this you from you.

Your margarita?

Come Oh, thanks.

with all the fixings, sir.

It's Mexican night.

He's got a taco bar in his crotch.

Thank you.

I hate you guys.

Audio mocks.

Get Blogger, bugger, race combo.

Go!

Try to read that taco bar.

I'm not kidding.

Look at his face.

He's just got 1,000 yards and stare on right now.

Look at that.

He's a broken man.

Yeah.

You talk with her in bed?

Ha-ha-ha!

Sir, you had one other party joining you for dinner today.

One other party.

You're all Who's your guest?

I don't have anybody joining me.

It's Sloppy Joe.

Oh, my god.

What this?

Oh, no, no.

Cute for you, what Sloppy Joe.

rattles.tree assistant Oh!

Oh, what is your story?

Sloppy joke!

Yes!

Go, race, go, Bob, go!

No!

No, no!

Start!

that way.

Those!

Oh, my God!

What's wrong with ya?

my God!

Oooh!

You're driving me!

Stop!

That's like...

Stop!

Stop No!

There you go, buddy.

Welcome back.

There you go.

You did it.

Wow.

You did it.

Look at the look.

You want some dessert?

No more guys, please.

Way to go, race car bomb.

Here go.

Here we go, buddy.

Oh, my James.

Oh, no.

That's dumb.

There's no way I'm going in there.

The arrows pointed down, right?

Guys, guys.

Come on, get in there.

And so it began.

Look at those.

What would you do something that you know I can't do?

You are halfway in the sewer yelling at us.

Get back in there.

Come on, get in there.

Oh, fuck this.

This is creepy.

What the f**k is this now?

I see two people on the cage.

Oh, she got the gloves?

I say who it is because you may know them.

It is on my f**king thesis.

It smells thesis in the cage.

Are okay?

Why are you here?

You stupid friends.

It's stuck us in this cage.

All right, so what's the padlock here?

Where's the key?

The stupid key is over there.

The key right there?

That's hanging out there?

Well, it looks like you guys are staying in there.

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

Oh my god!

It's a zombie apocalypse!

Oh my god!

Get away from me, your songs are bitches.

Oh, you got to be shitting me right now.

What the f**k out of here, you son of a bitch?

Ha ha ha ha ha I'm hyperventilating.

No, you're going to let your nieces get me by the zombies and you're going to that key.

Get that key!

Give that life!

What the is this?

Oh, bud.

Oh!

Oh, my That's it.

But how are you going to get down?

They're blocking the exit.

I hate the f***ing people.

I wish you had some big, raw meat that you could throw over the railing.

Oh, God.

And by the way, look at how your nieces are handling this.

It's much better than you.

There you go.

There There you go.

Buddy, throw it over.

Just crack the zombies, Buddy.

You hungry bitches?

Here we go.

You need a weapon, buddy.

You need a weapon.

Just **** bad.

That's it?

Your zombies head down.

There you go, buddy.

I'm gonna hit him in the hand.

You look like an action hero, buddy.

This is it.

I like the cage, buddy.

I I can't.

I this.

Oh, God.

Sit down.

We got to push the cage.

Come on, see what they...

I'll protect you.

Finally, he thinks about his thesis and him being safe.

Go, go, get out of here.

Go.

Screw you zombies.

Oh.

Screw you zombies.

Oh, f**king hell, yeah.

Hey, how's it going, man?

Brooklyn tradition, help a stranger bury something in the park.

Ah, you'll never mouth anything in this burrow.

Red shirt.

Yeah, hi.

You want to help me bury something?

I'm dead serious.

I two shovels.

What?

She's coming.

Wow.

She is.

This is sweet, huh?

I just have to bury this thing.

And you're going to help?

This is amazing.

Oh, boy.

Yeah, that's a sex robot on the shirt, doesn't it?

I need time to play.

To me, Brian.

Oh, you brought a friend.

This is getting creepy.

I have more play, put it in.

Okay.

If you don't mind helping me bury my sex robot.

I have more to hear.

Oh, oh, there we go.

Just her mouth, Ruby.

Yeah, there we go.

Stop talking to me, Lily.

All right, Ruby.

Now that this chapter in my life is done, do you want to go grab a drink?

What do you say?

Let's go, Ruby, let's get out of here.

Come on, I'll carry you back to you.

MUSIC Q lost, and we're here at the Brooklyn Cyclones Game First Punishment.

Buddy, all you have to do is walk out there onto the pitcher's mound and just say no.

No.

All right.

Well, obviously something else is going on.

Yes!

I don't like this.

Oh, God.

What is this?

Oh, God.

Okay, Q.

He's got to say no, no matter what happens.

Oh, my, I'm on the, I'm on the Jumbo Tron.

I don't like all these people staring at me, guys.

Ladies and gentlemen, we kindly ask you to please direct your attention to the pitcher's mound.

Coming to the field, we have a very special guest.

We a very lovely lady that Q has never seen before in his life.

He's going to go out and say a few words right now.

Fifth-generation Coney Island resident, and a proud cyclone season ticket holder.

She is the co-share person and founder of Tree Makers Children's Fund, a nonprofit organization that specializes in education and assisting underprivileged children.

She's an amazing person, we're gonna raise the planning.

And she now might be able to share a very special moment with her.

Alright, okay.

I So fun boys, this ain't so bad Honey, for the last seven years, you've made me the happiest I've ever been in my life.

You are my best friend, my mentor, my love, my part, my world.

From the moment I met you, I knew this was something different, something I've never experienced before.

I don't want to spend enough...

not being your wife.

Can you see what's happening to you?

What going on?

Ryan, Michael Quinn, will you marry me?

No.

I love your sense of humor.

It's one of the things that loves the best of us here.

This time, I'm actually, I'm serious, for real.

My parents took the bus from Tampa and they're here tonight.

They're fancy.

Oh, God.

So, Brian, with my parents, is witnesses.

All kidding is that in front of the whole stadium.

Will you marry me?

No, no, no, I love you from the bottom of my fur and I'm in front of all these people.

Please marry me.

No, no, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I no, she's on the market.

If anybody's interested.

Oh my God, God, is this the best punishment ever?

No, yes!

Oh, God.

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支持剧场、阅读、混合等多种观影模式，全方位双语体验

多种练习模式

支持句子精听、口语测评、选择填空、默写等多种练习方式

AI 视频总结

使用 OpenAI 对视频总结，快速视频概要，掌握关键内容

AI 字幕

只需3-5分钟，即可生成 YouTube AI 字幕，精准且快速

AI 单词释义

轻点字幕中的单词，即可查询释义，并有AI释义赋能

AI 语法分析

对句子进行语法分析，快速理解句子含义，掌握难点语法

更多网页功能

Trancy 支持视频双语字幕同时，还可提供网页的单词翻译和全文翻译功能